Psychosis in borderline personality disorder.
Yes, the two of the most stigmatized disorders. I am diagnosed with both and that being said life with them isn’t that easy.
Generally these words are thrown to demean and insult others a lot of time by others. Like what a borderline!! Or psycho. Well to normal people that may sound ok. But I find these words stigmatizing.
Some of the psychosis symptoms are prevalent in people living with borderline personality disorder like hallucinations and paranoia.
Hallucinations are the false perceptions of like hearing, viewing or touching something that essentially isn’t there. In my case the most common is auditory hallucinations i.e hearing voices. Generally they feel like occuring inside my head. Sometimes it’s the muffled voices that don’t make any sense or other times two people arguing and negatively criticizing me or ordering to harm myself.
Few times I had visual hallucinations too , viewing different shapes of object or sudden unknown faces in the room. And I clearly know that the things aren’t real. I am hallucinating but it feels very scary. It lasts for few hours.
Paranoia is an intense fear of being under threat and sense of distrust in things. Under extreme stress Paranoia symptoms occur in bpd people. And to others they may come across totally unreasonable and crazy.
Derealization- another psychosis symptom that people with bpd have. It’s the feeling of not being in your body. For me , i feel numb, spaced out and observing myself from far away. Specially when I am deeply hurt , I feel zoned out and observe myself sitting and everything is happening to my body and I am observing it from a distance. It feels like being locked in a glass wall and I am shouting , yelling and crying for help but I am invisible and unreachable to everyone.
This are some psychosis symptoms I experience along with borderline personality disorder. That being said I am still me and despite everything I fight everyday to be alive , happy and thrive. It’s sometimes tough to handle with but I am strong enough to fight with all the storms in my life.